I use EMDR in the context of relational therapy, and I might suggest it as part of our work together. You might also have heard of EMDR and want us to focus our work in that way.
EMDR is a way to process traumatic experiences involving bilateral stimulation, usually eye movements. Trauma causes memories to be frozen and re-experienced rather than a story from the past that, however difficult, we can talk about from a distance. EMDR can start to melt that frozen memory and allow the brain to “re-process” it.
EMDR was originally developed by Francine Shapiro in the context of single event trauma, and this is where it has the best evidence base. For example, when someone has been in a car accident and driving has become difficult or impossible. However, EMDR is more and more being used for complex trauma including abuse and neglect, as well as issues like depression an anxiety. We might not intuitively link such issues to trauma, but they are recognised these days as frequently resulting from ongoing relational disruptions and misattunements, so-called “small-t” trauma.
In many cases, EMDR is not a linear process where you are done after a set number of sessions. However, often even a short number of sessions can bring surprising shifts and relief.
EMDR stands for “Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing”. Desensitisation because the memory becomes much less “hot” — less something you can't even bear thinking about. Reprocessing: The brain has kept the memory frozen in time and with very rigid links to painful emotional responses, to negative self-image etc. These associations are opened up and made more flexible; new associations are formed, for example with positive memories that contradict the negative belief or self-image.
EMDR starts with stabilisation and resourcing phase, and explicitly recognises the importance of the therapy relationship. Depending on the issues we want to work on, we'll make sure we spend enough time on these. This includes focussed work on connecting you to inner resources such as positive memories, and possibly other tools to regulate your nervous system.
Together we identify memories that are linked to current issues you would like to change, for example negative self-beliefs or being “triggered” by a traumatic memory in present situations.
During an EMDR processing session, we focus on a specific memory, the so-called “target”. While you hold that memory in mind, I guide you through sets of bilateral stimulation (usually eye movements, though we might use sounds or taps). EMDR sessions last 60 minutes, sligthly longer than regular sessions (same fee). We may spend more than one session on a target memory. Sometimes such a memory quickly resolves and moves from a raw, overwhelming experience to something you can remember without the intense emotional charge.
For more repeated trauma that has subsequently linked into other relationships and aspects of your sense of self, EMDR is often a good way to “get the ball rolling”, but improvement may not be such a dramatically obvious positive shift. Like most therapy, the change will be more subtle and over time. If you decide on a shorter course of therapy, the change can also continue after the sessions are over (just as change in therapy occurs between the sessions, too).
Yes and no.
Depending on what you bring, we can focus on a short number of sessions. But from the very first session, the therapy relationship is there between us, and it is important. You are a human being with a nervous system primed for attachment and relationship, but with your experiences of disruptions to those needs, of disappointments and danger, and you are meeting the nervous system of another human being. A therapist is trained to work with the dynamic this brings.
EMDR and relational therapy in my view are a powerful combination enhancing each other. EMDR accesses unconscious associations quickly and its non-verbal embodied process can bypass self-defeating cognitive and narrative loops. Yet new neural growth, and changes in the real world and in relationships, can take time. EMDR can bring up strong emotions that don't all just dissipate like magic. This is where the power of “plain old therapy”, of two human beings relating in implicit non-verbal as well as explicitly verbal ways, can build on that momentum.